2009 Already? (A Long one)

At this time last year if someone would have said to me, "Next year at this time you will be very pregnant!" I would have laughed in their face and said, "Oh no, not me, we are going to wait for a while!" What an unexpected blessing that we received in 2008...Matt has said more than once, "We had a plan, and God laughed!" We grow more and more excited as Kellen's arrival is nearing. But at the same time I have got a horrible case of the "What if's!" I have been told that every new mother has these, and that has helped calm me a little, but not really. Matt could not be more excited he has the attitude of everything will be fine and work out just the way it is supposed to! I have been trying to take on this same attitude, but my "what if's" have a pretty strong hold over me. If you ask Matt how I am...he will tell you that I am doing great! Don't listen, the poor thing has been putting up with a "VERY" moody Stephanie for a while now.

As for Christmas, Kellen made out like a bandit. Grandma Marquitta bought him his car seat, which was a BIG help to us. Uncle Andy and Aunt Crystal bought him a very cute Pooh outfit. Aunt Sara spoiled him with a bunch of very cute clothes. Grandma Dee bought him a very cute picture for his room and some very cute frames. Then with all the Christmas money that Matt and I received we bought some last minute items that we felt like we needed. So I can honestly say now that we are ready for him...whenever he decides to come.

I have had a couple of Dr's appointments since the last update. Things are going well. My blood pressure remains good along with all of my other vitals that they check. Kellen's heart rate has been good and strong. He is still moving away in there. He doesn't really kick so much as just move around and stretch out. At my ultrasound on Tuesday they estimated his weight at 7 lbs 13 0z. Yes almost 8 lbs with 3 weeks to go. The ultrasound Dr then told me that he has a BIG head and looks like he will be difficult to birth. Of course this does not help my case of "what if's" that I have. He also told me that if he continues to grow at this rate he would be about 11-12 lbs. Yes you read that right! One BIG Boy! I was by myself at this ultrasound so of course when I left I was a little bit of a mess. Matt just laughed and thinks it is a little funny. I on the other hand have had to remind myself that this is just an estimation and it can be off as much as a pound. So of course it sparked a bunch of questions....Will they take him early? Will I have to be induced? Will they want to do a c-section? What if they decide that it would be best to take him early and he is not as big as they say, then did we make the wrong decision? Pretty much from day 1 I have wanted to do a natural, no drug birth, but all of those options don't really lead to that outcome. Corrinna (our Doula) has said that if I am induced I probably will need to take the drugs, because it is like going from 0 to 60 and our bodies are just not meant to do that. Then most people that I have known lately that have been induced ended up in a c-section. So neither option really goes down the path that I wanted for my birth. But I will do whatever is necessary for the safety of Kellen and for me. I have not meant with my OB Dr since this ultrasound, so I will have to wait till Tuesday to ask my millions of questions. Until then here is a picture of Kellen from Tuesday.

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