Facing the Scale...

Do you remember when your battle with the scale started?  I do.

My hatred for the scale began during the 6th grade.  I can still remember going from this skinny bean pole to getting boobs & hips and gaining 30 pounds during that year.  Why do I remember this so vividly? I remember this because my teacher showed us our weight as we were walking in to the class and she accidentally showed my friend in front of me my weight and I can still hear the words that came out of her mouth filled with total disgust, "That is NOT my weight"!!!

WELL it was mine.  Before that moment, I don't know if I ever recognized skinny vs. fat or even that people looked at other as skinny or fat.  BUT after that moment I was very aware of my weight and that I was heavier than my friends around me.

My Freshman year of high school I made the cheer leading squad and was told by one of the coaches that I would need to work on losing weight, because she didn't think any of the uniforms would fit me.  It took a toll on me and my self image.  I began to see myself as fat  and that I needed to lose weight.  As a Teenager that knew nothing about nutrition, I thought the best way to do that was to just not eat.  My Junior year I gave up sports and things at home were getting a little crazy.  This is when I began my emotional eating!  I love food and food became a comfort for me.  As the numbers on the scale began to creep up I just shoved my feelings down with food.

After High School I moved to Atlanta and became a nanny.  When I began my 2nd Nanny job, I was introduced to Weight Watchers.  Both parents did it and I loved counting points and keeping track of my meals.  I lost 20 lbs in a couple months and felt great!  But that is where I seem to hit a wall!  I lose just enough weight to start to feel good and then I hit a wall and slowly slip back to my old ways.

During my first year of marriage, I crossed over 200 pounds, BUT instead of doing anything about it I ate more to drown my sorrows.  I continued to gain weight for the next 2 years until I hit 230 pounds.  My neighborhood did a "biggest loser" competition and Gold's Gym was one of the sponsors.  Two trainers came in and talked to us about diet and exercise.  I decided it was time...so I joined the gym and hired a trainer.  I trained hard, but only managed to lose 15 pounds...at that point I didn't understand the "secret" to losing weight!

Then SURPRISE I was pregnant!  I continued to work out with my trainer for the first 5 months of my pregnancy and managed to keep my weight under control, but as soon as I stopped my weight went out of control.  I gained 60 pounds during my pregnancy and I was miserable.  I did not lose my baby weight.  For 3 years I struggled with my weight and fought so many emotions.

In 2012 I knew it was AGAIN time for a change!  I was tired and felt sick all the time.  I wanted to be healthy and happy.  I was weighing in at 243 pounds and I really was miserable.  I couldn't believe that I had done this to myself and couldn't imagine why I continued to eat.

So I rounded up 7 other girlfriends and we did an 8 week weight loss challenge.  It was so much fun!  It breaks down all the components of a healthy life style into easy steps (See Here for the challenge).  I highly recommend it!  We all pitched in $25 and had 2 winners of $100 each!  It was so fun!  I lost 20 lbs during the challenge and even managed to pick up a few good habits from it!

Soon after we got pregnant with Baby #2 (we had been trying for 6 months and I was at the point I thought it wasn't going to happen)!  During my 2nd pregnancy I gained 35 pounds, but this time around I was able to breastfeed for 10 months.  I not only lost all my baby weight, but managed to lose a few extra along with it!  Then the holidays hit and I gained a few pounds and ended the year yet again making the resolution to loose weight.

In April 2014 I decided I was done.  I changed my eating completely and slowly began to lose weight!  In June I decided to take the next step and join a boot camp!  I knew I needed support and what better way to do that then join a couple friends that taught the boot camp in my neighborhood.  It was then I became addicted to exercise.  I hit a BIG goal and finally made it under 200 pounds!  I could not believe it!  It was the best feeling.

I have slowly come to realize a couple of things.

  • Accountability is a huge part of my success
  • It is OK to cheat, but don't let it make you spin out of control
  • I can lose weight naturally, but it takes A LOT of work
  • Slow and steady and I WILL win the race
  • It is slowly becoming about how I feel and less about the number on the scale

I want to blog about my journey for a couple of reasons...

1)  I believe I have a story to tell and if I can help one person not feel alone on their journey then I will have accomplished my goal.

2)  I want to change my family and end the cycle of obesity in my family.  I don't want my son or daughter to face the same challenges I have.  I know that is possible and it can happen if I have faith.  AND if I can share that with others then together, we can change the world.

So what can you look forward to...
  • Weekly weigh in updates
  • Favorite Recipes
  • Favorite Workouts
  • my meal plans
  • Other ways I am changing up my life
  • a little bit of Everyday Life mixed in
  • Plus SO much more...

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***Please note that by no means am I a professional.  I have no formal training of any kind. I am just a girl writing about my own weight loss journey and sharing things that worked for me.  Before starting any new life change, please consult your Dr.  

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